"If people are really narcissistic or have a need to be seen as more than they really are, or to be admired as having it all together, then they cannot be followed and trusted by others." —Henry Cloud
Narcissism: A self-centered personality style characterized as having an excessive interest in one's physical appearance and an excessive preoccupation with one's own needs, often at the expense of others. It is human nature to be selfish and boastful to a certain degree. There is a significant difference between healthy narcissism, being self-absorbed and difficult and having a pathological mental illness-like narcissistic personality disorder.
Narcissism is a personality complex developed to run away from traumas. They inflate their own egos and talk about themselves all the time to make up for the lack of actual Love they feel inside.
It's the same way how traumatized women use tons of makeup and surgery to make their traumatized vessels appear more attractive. They don't really love themselves, so they developed an outer shell of false confidence.
They know if they don't focus on inflating themselves and disregarding others' emotions, they will have to face their own. Under that illusion of pride and ego is really a damaged person who hasn't received the love they believe they deserved. Thus they hide their need for Love with an over focus on material success to the exclusion of everything else.
Instead of doing the inner shadow work to heal their traumas from childhood and previous relationships. They instead project all their traumas and issues onto you
Any attempts to hold them accountable for anything at all seem like an attack so they retaliate by inflating themselves further.
Narcissists live their lives in constant fear. They fear every single thing they did to you that caused suffering. They fear being abandoned, controlled, criticized, smeared; and exposed to you, the world; but even worse—themselves.
They seem to only care about themselves and their emotions because they developed an artificial image that they must maintain at all costs. To take accountability is seen as a weakness, they have fooled themselves into believing they're actually who they say they are.
They haven't put in the inner work to actually vibrate at that level of self-confidence so they feed off the energy of those around them to inflate their EGO. Now remember, like attracts like, you can only attract these types of people, if you match their level of self-love
They just hide their lack of self-love with an overly inflated sense of self-importance. Your lack of self-love keeps your self-worth so low that you allow these people to remain in your life.
We only allow people into our lives that vibrate on our level of self-worth
The narcissist has just found a way to protect and defend their lack of self-love
The person dating the narcissist plays the victim to gain sympathy for their lack of self-love.
The Victim and the Narcissist are both coping mechanisms used to avoid their Traumas. For as long as the victim has that mentality of the victim they will attract being a victim in their next relationship. This cycle happens over and over until they finally decide, MAYBE IT IS ME WHO IS CREATING THESE VICTIM SCENARIOS!
They can then take accountability, HEAL, and then attract a better person who actually LOVES themselves and thus can truly LOVE them. So if you attracted a narcissist this says more about you and your SELF-WORTH/SELF-LOVE than anything else. When You Fully Love Yourself, You Will Attract Someone Who Fully Loves You Also!
“In your healing process, you attract someone who is conscious, deep, passionate, sensitive and spiritual as much as you. Someone who makes you believe in yourself and your self-love. Someone who wants to evolve with you, not just in this dimension, but in all levels.” —Carl Gustav Jung, founder of analytical psychology
YOU DESERVE TO HAVE A FULLY LOVING CARING PARTNER!
YOU DESERVE TO BE FULLY HEALED OF YOUR TRAUMAS!
YOU DESERVE TO GIVE YOURSELF THE LOVE YOU HAVE BEEN SEEKING FROM OTHERS FIRST!
ALL GLORY BE TO THE MOST HIGH
SMILE AND GIVE THANKS